Saturday, February 10, 2007

Shocking! Bees in the walls!

A few weeks ago we bought our 4 year old son a very cool nightlight. It looks like a small lava lamp, with blue luminescent liquid that circulates a reflective glitter around. The first night we plugged it in, he was fascinated with it. A half hour or so after saying goodnight, we heard a blood-curdling scream come from his room, followed by hysterical cries. We bolted upstairs. "The bees! The bees!" he kept screaming between his uncontrollable sobs. He had tried to unplug his nightlight and touched the metal prongs while they were still connected to the outlet. We explained to him about electricity and why he shouldn't play with it. Of course, that couldn't be the end of it. Today we found him trying to put something in an outlet. Again.

"Remember the bees?"

"But we can pour bee-juice in there, and then the bees will get dead!"

At this point I'm having ugly visions. This is one of my monkey-children. No matter where you put it, or how high, if he wants it bad enough he will get his hands on it.

"You are NOT spraying anything in my outlets. Do I make myself clear?"

"You don't spray it, you put it in a cup and pour it in. Then the bees will find it and eat it, and then they'll get dead!" He's proud of himself. He believes he's found a solution to a massive problem, and all he needs to do is convince us of his brilliance.

My husband steps in. "There are no bees in the walls, son." He goes on to explain by using the example of static electricity. He shows him how if he shuffles his feet on the rug, he can zap someone. Our son is excited to find a new way to torture his sisters. My husband informs him how the electricity in the walls is much more powerful and can even kill you. His answer?

"Daddy, bees can't kill you. They just sting you."

We may have to refer to Schoolhouse Rock for this one. In the meantime we're going to make sure the Raid is in an ultra-secure place.

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